The Blessings of Love + Life
The Importance of Loving Others - Not Just Our Partners - The Way God Wants Us To
Photo by Emmanuel Phaeton on Unsplash
Most of the time, it’s natural and effortless to love your family and those you are “supposed” to love. Actually, almost always, even when you’re so mad at your loved ones, you still love them. We can forgive our loved ones for almost anything, we can excuse their words, behaviors, and actions because we love them, we forgive them when they hurt us, and support them in their pursuits. We even enable our loved ones when it comes to addiction or mental health struggles by providing them a safe place to land instead of getting them the help they need.
Dare I say, it is easy to love our family.
But what about everyone else in the world? There, love gets trickier. It becomes easy to dislike anyone we disagree with, compete against, resist, challenge, and yes, we can even hate others who do not think like us. Who do not agree with us, or worship like us, or believe like us, talk like us, act like us, or love like us. It’s easy to slip into a mindset of superiority when it comes to others who do not exactly align with how we see the world.
There is a history of war, hate, terror, and persecution throughout the world, time and time again, started either by a drive and love of power or fear of those who are different than us. We do terrible things in the name of love, beliefs, faith, justice. And we excuse it away because of our mentality that “it’s for the greater good”.
But is it really? Is hate disguised as justice really the answer?
We’ve just finished celebrating Christmas - the birth of Jesus. Jesus who was born in a manger, in a stable, on a cold night, surrounded by animals, shepherds, and angels. Jesus who spent His whole life learning and living for God, but also for us. Jesus who died for us and our sins. Jesus who loved completely and unconditionally, without regard for what others looked like, what they believed, or how they worshiped.
The Bible says “God is love”. Well, I believe that Jesus is the epitome of love. He didn’t hit back when people beat Him, He didn’t lash out with cruel words filled with hate when people said horrible things to Him and about Him, He didn’t think less of others because they didn’t worship the same way He did, He didn’t judge others for their line of work. He loved unconditionally. He lived by example. He spoke His truth and taught others with His gentleness, kindness, compassion. With a servant’s heart.
What if we approached others in this way? What if instead of flinging insults at people who believe differently than us, we showed them love? Loving someone doesn’t mean you agree with them - do you agree with everything your loved ones say and do? Loving someone means that despite their flaws and struggles, you love them anyway.
Mark Groves said, “Unconditional love is not unconditional tolerance.”
I don’t think someone else could have said this any better. Loving someone unconditionally does not mean that you allow them to control, manipulate, hurt, or take advantage of you. Unconditional love does not mean that you do not establish and maintain healthy boundaries. Boundaries help to create a safe, protected space where you can love freely and practice a beautiful vulnerability with others.
Do not get confused as to what unconditional love is. Even God set boundaries for us to respect in our relationship with Him. God provided Moses with the Ten Commandments as part of His boundaries for us. Jesus reiterated the importance of the Ten Commandments in His sermons and His example, so we know that the Ten Commandments are part of God’s boundaries. By honoring His boundaries, we show God our love for Him. And even when we don’t honor His boundaries, He loves us - unconditionally. We do not have to earn His love.
So if we don’t have to earn God’s love, why do we live in such a way where others have to earn our love? Today, I am challenging you to love unconditionally.
5 Ways to Love Unconditionally
Pray for the people in your life
Establish, communicate, and maintain healthy boundaries
Let go of expectations for relationships. Do not expect people to return your unconditional love or for other’s to appreciate your unconditional love
Practice speaking with the four parts of kindness: are you speaking with gentleness? Helpfulness? Are you taking the initiative? Are you willing to help?
Understand and accept that everyone has their own journey and it may look very different from yours and that’s okay. Providing acceptance can make people feel loved if they are used to feeling criticized, ridiculed, or judged for their lifestyle, beliefs, and opinions
Loving unconditionally is not easy, but it is beautiful. I myself struggle with this, but I do know that it’s possible to love the way God wants us to love, as long as we rely on Him for success. So as you think of your New Year’s Resolutions, I’d like to invite you to make loving unconditionally one of your resolutions for 2022. I think it could change your life! If you’d like to explore how to set healthy boundaries while practicing unconditional love, please schedule a Discovery Call with me! I’d be happy to explore this with you!
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Thumbnail photo by Emmanuel Phaeton on Unsplash
