Rediscovering Happiness in a Strained Relationship

Maintaining healthy relationships requires effort, communication, and understanding. However, even the strongest bonds can go through periods of strain, where joy and laughter seem like distant memories. But fear not! In this blog post, we will explore practical steps and strategies to bring joy and laughter back into a strained relationship. By fostering open communication, practicing empathy, engaging in shared activities, and nurturing a positive mindset, we can create an environment where happiness thrives once again.

Cultivate Open Communication

Effective communication is the cornerstone of any successful relationship. To rebuild joy and laughter, it is crucial to foster open and honest dialogue. Here's how:

  • Active Listening: Give your undivided attention, maintain eye contact, and show genuine interest when your partner speaks. Reflect their words back to them to ensure understanding and validate their feelings.

  • Express Yourself: Share your own thoughts and emotions without judgment or criticism. Be assertive yet respectful, and use "I" statements to express your perspective.

  • Practice Empathy: Seek to understand your partner's point of view and emotions. Put yourself in their shoes and validate their experiences, showing compassion and support.

Rediscover Shared Activities

Engaging in activities together can reignite joy and laughter in a strained relationship. By creating opportunities for shared experiences, you can strengthen your connection. Consider the following:

  • Date Nights: Plan regular date nights to spend quality time together. Choose activities that you both enjoy, such as cooking together, going for a hike, or watching a favorite movie. This dedicated time fosters intimacy and builds positive memories.

  • Explore New Hobbies: Discover new activities or hobbies that interest both of you. Whether it's taking dance lessons, painting, or playing a sport, engaging in shared interests can create a sense of adventure and bring joy into the relationship.

  • Laugh Together: Watch a comedy show or a funny movie that resonates with both of you. Laughter is a powerful tool to release tension and create a joyful atmosphere. Share jokes, funny stories, or playful banter to lighten the mood.

Nurture a Positive Mindset

A positive mindset can transform a strained relationship by shifting focus from negativity to appreciation and gratitude. Here are some ways to cultivate positivity:

  • Practice Gratitude: Express appreciation for your partner's efforts, no matter how small. Gratitude promotes a sense of contentment and reminds us of the positive aspects of the relationship.

  • Focus on Each Other’s Strengths: Instead of dwelling on weaknesses or shortcomings, acknowledge and celebrate each other's strengths. Encourage personal growth and emphasize the positive qualities that attracted you to each other.

  • Create a Supportive Environment: Establish an atmosphere where encouragement and positivity flourish. Avoid blaming or criticizing each other and replace negative statements with constructive feedback and affirmations.

Prioritize Quality Time and Intimacy

In a strained relationship, it's important to prioritize quality time and intimacy to rebuild emotional connection and bring back joy. To practice this, you can try the following:

  • Unplug and Be Present: Dedicate time to disconnect from technology and be fully present with your partner. Engage in meaningful conversations, cuddle, or simply enjoy each other's company without distractions.

  • Physical Affection: Physical touch is a powerful way to reconnect and create a sense of closeness. Hugs, kisses, holding hands, or gentle touches can all contribute to fostering intimacy and joy.

  • Emotional Intimacy: Share your fears, dreams, and vulnerabilities with each other. By opening up emotionally and creating a safe space for vulnerability, you can deepen your bond and rebuild trust.

Practice Self-Care and Personal Growth

To contribute positively to a strained relationship, it's crucial to prioritize self-care and personal growth. When you take care of yourself, you can show up as a happier and more balanced partner. Consider the following:

  • Self-Reflection: Reflect on your own thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. Identify any patterns or habits that may contribute to the strain in your relationship and work on personal growth in those areas.

  • Self-Compassion: Be kind to yourself and practice self-compassion. Acknowledge that relationships go through ups and downs, and it's normal to face challenges. Treat yourself with patience and understanding.

  • Pursue Personal Interests: Engage in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment outside of the relationship. Cultivating your own passions and interests will not only enhance your individual well-being but also contribute positively to the relationship.

Seek Professional Support

If the strain in your relationship persists or seems insurmountable, don't hesitate to seek professional support. Couples therapy, counseling, or relationship coaching can provide a neutral space where both partners can express their feelings, learn effective communication techniques, and gain insights into the dynamics of their relationship. A trained therapist or coach can help you navigate the challenges and guide you toward a healthier and more fulfilling partnership.


Using laughter as a healing mechanism can be a powerful tool to navigate difficult situations, reduce stress, and foster emotional well-being.

Five Ways to Incorporate Laughter into Your Life for Healing

  1. Find Humor in Everyday Situations: Train yourself to find the humor in everyday life. Look for the lighter side of challenging or stressful situations. Laughing at life's absurdities can help shift your perspective and reduce the intensity of negative emotions. Share funny anecdotes or observations with others, allowing laughter to bring a sense of relief and healing.

  2. Engage in Laughter Exercises: Participate in activities that encourage laughter. Laughter yoga, for example, combines deep breathing exercises with playful laughter, helping release tension and promote relaxation. Seek out laughter workshops or classes in your community or online. These structured activities can guide you in finding joy and laughter even when it may feel challenging.

  3. Surround Yourself with Humor: Introduce humor into your environment. Surround yourself with funny books, movies, or TV shows that make you laugh. Follow humorous social media accounts or listen to comedy podcasts. When you expose yourself to humor regularly, you invite laughter into your life, providing a healing and uplifting experience.

  4. Share Laughter with Loved Ones: Laughing with others can create a strong bond and foster emotional healing. Spend time with loved ones who have a great sense of humor. Engage in activities that spark laughter, such as playing games, watching comedy shows, or sharing funny stories. Creating an atmosphere of shared laughter strengthens relationships and provides a supportive space for healing.

  5. Embrace Playfulness: Allow yourself to be playful and embrace your inner child. Engage in activities that make you feel lighthearted and carefree, such as playing games, dancing, or engaging in silly antics. Give yourself permission to be spontaneous, let go of inhibitions, and laugh freely. Playfulness can help release stress and promote healing through laughter. To learn more about the importance of practicing playfulness in your relationship, check out this blog post.

Remember, laughter is a personal experience, and what may be funny to one person may not be to another. Focus on finding what brings you joy and allows you to laugh genuinely. Embrace laughter as a healing mechanism, and let it become a source of strength, connection, and positivity in your life.

Bringing back joy and laughter into a strained relationship requires dedication and a willingness to make positive changes. By cultivating open communication, rediscovering shared activities, and nurturing a positive mindset, you can create an environment that promotes happiness and strengthens your bond. Remember, building a joyful relationship takes time, patience, and a genuine desire to reconnect with your partner. Embrace these strategies, and you will find yourself on a journey toward a happier, more fulfilling relationship filled with laughter and love.

If you are struggling with bringing joy and laughter back into your relationship, please schedule a Discovery Call with me and we can explore how relationship coaching may be a great next step for you!

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Thumbnail Photo by Fabian Centeno on Unsplash

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